


smile

by creamyn



Category: Free!
Genre: An Attempt At Humour, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, That's it, communication is the key kids!!!, don't end up misunderstanding like them, hiyori getting the care he needed and Deserved, they're saps
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-11
Updated: 2018-09-11
Packaged: 2019-07-10 18:44:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15955265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/creamyn/pseuds/creamyn
Summary: Drowning.Ikuya's drowning, and nobody's there to save him.





	smile

Drowning.

Ikuya’s drowning. Nobody’s there to save him.

Nobody. _Nobody._

 _Haru isn’t there to save me anymore_ , he thinks as he looks up to the dark sky, comfortably seated onto the slide’s top.

When Hiyori approaches Ikuya, the latter’s only half listening to what he has to say.

When Hiyori babbles something sounding like he could ‘reach a worldwide level’, Ikuya almost believes him- _wants_ to believe him, because he can hear it. He can _hear_ how genuine Hiyori’s words are at this right moment.

But insecurities pop back up before he knows it. Suddenly it feels like he’s drowning, and he remembers the sensation of the water fighting against him- no- of _him fighting against the water,_ slowing himself down with every practice.

Hiyori’s stopped talking before he knew it, and when Ikuya answers, Haru’s name is already on the tip of his tongue. That apparently wasn’t the right thing to do, because suddenly he’s sliding down, pulled by Hiyori’s grip on his wrist. Ikuya can’t quite put his finger on the look of the man looking down at him.

_Is that anger? Sadness? Or maybe something else?_

He doesn’t know.

And then, Hiyori is telling him to forget. To forget about Haru.

Ikuya frowns at that.

Because Hiyori doesn’t know. He doesn’t know that Ikuya is _trying_ to forget.

And by forget, he means _everything_ \- not only Haru, but also the way he’s struggling against the water, the way everyone is always nagging at him, worrying about him- the way he’s so _tired_ about- about all of _this_.

Anger is bobbling up inside him. He doesn’t know- what to do. What to do with all these emotions. So he directs them at Hiyori, and finds himself screaming at him.

The words come out before he can stop them.

**_“This is none of your concern, Hiyori!”_ **

Guilt suddenly overwhelms Ikuya when he sees the devastated look on Hiyori’s face. He feels a pinch in his heart as these familiar walnut eyes unfocus somewhere behind him, looking completely lost, _broken_.

Hiyori deserved nothing of this. Nothing. This was just Ikuya being a child and lashing out at somebody.

This was just Ikuya being an idiot.

 _“Sorry.”_ Is all he can mutter before running away.

Running away-

Like the coward he is.

\----

Hiyori doesn’t know how he got back to his dorm. He feels lost- he _is_ lost, and Ikuya’s words are still echoing in his head- like a sword piercing through his body, digging a hole into his heart, and rubbing it a few times for good purpose.

_“This is none of your concern!”_

Maybe Ikuya’s right. Maybe he’s looking into something that’s none of his business.

But what could he do about it?

If Hiyori didn’t keep being that desperate- didn’t keep holding onto _his prince_ \- he would have turned into sea foam a long time ago already.

 

But maybe that’s what it is. Maybe what Hiyori’s doing is clutching at an impossible goal, trying to delay his fall.

Hiyori blinks back the tears prickling at his eyes.

_Fuck._

No. He doesn’t want this. He doesn’t want to be alone in this shitty room, thinking about a prince that only has eyes for another man with eyes as blue as the sea.

Tears fall down steadily, and he slowly drifts into sleep.

\----

The next days are painfully awkward.

Ikuya walks past Hiyori as he gets out of water, and he feels a pair of eyes staring into his back.

But he can’t afford himself to turn back now. Because he’s alone now.

He _chose_ to be alone.

When their teammates ask them if they’re fighting, Ikuya doesn’t turn back to Hiyori. He only averts his eyes, looking ahead on the dim streets.

“It’s nothing like that.”

Once again, Ikuya is running away.

Once again, Hiyori is left alone, looking at the prince’s back.

He dugs his head down, clutching at his own hair.

“Fuck. Why did it turn out like this...?”

_\----_

When Asahi mentions Hiyori as his ‘friend’, Ikuya blinks.

“I’m not sure.”

“Huh?

“I’m not sure. If Hiyori is my friend.”

And he means it.

What Ikuya’s been doing for the past years was contradictory to them being friends. He’s distanced himself from everyone- even his own _brother_ \- focusing on a goal too far ahead of him.

“Is that so…”

From the corner of his eye, Ikuya can see Asahi gulping down.

“Ikuya… I want you to know that- no matter what happened, and no matter what will happen, I’ve always. And will always consider you as a friend. Always.”

Ikuya smiles at that.

He’s grateful to have talked to Asahi. It’s honestly been a long time, and saying out loud what’s on his heart felt oddly good.

“Thank you.”

\----

Hiyori slides down the wall, dropping his head in-between his open knees.

Shielding himself from everything surrounding him.

_Turning into sea foam._

“Then what am I to you… Ikuya…”

\----

Ikuya’s racing with Nanase. The beginning was tough, but he’s overcome it now.

Ikuya’s winning.

Hiyori can vaguely see them talking to each other, then Ikuya’s suddenly launching himself at Nanase, circling muscular arms around the swimmer. Crying at his heart’s content.

Hiyori clutches at the water bottle in his hand.

Okay.

This was okay. Hiyori was okay.

Ikuya was fine now. Hiyori would go to him, apologize, then they’d go back to their normal selves- quiet Ikuya and talkative Hiyori.

They would go back to normal.

Hiyori clutched tightly at his water bottle as he convinced himself.

_It’s okay._

\----

Ikuya runs. He runs around the buildings, looking for Hiyori.

Hiyori.

 _Hiyori_.

When he finds him, his breathing stops.

Hiyori’s sitting at a table, shoulders slumped, head dug low, looking below him.

This time, it’s Ikuya who’s staring at Hiyori’s back.

“Hiyori.”

He can only call out to him, in hope that Hiyori would turn back.

\----

Hiyori turns back.

As he takes in his grim expression, Ikuya realizes that he’s never turned back to Hiyori.

\----

Hiyori looks at Ikuya.

Usually, the smile prickling at the corners of his mouth would appear as soon as he saw him.

He doesn’t remember when he’s picked up that habit.

But this time, it takes time for Hiyori to smile at Ikuya.

This time, it’s almost painful to wear that smile on his face.

Hiyori wants to smack himself.

_Come on. Smile. Smile and apologize. Then you’ll go back to normal._

_Back to normal._

\----

When Ikuya offered to swim a relay with him, Hiyori couldn’t quite believe his own ears.

Did he hear that right? Did Ikuya really want to swim with him?

_With him?_

_Not Nanase?_

But once Ikuya smiles at him, Hiyori melts.

“Come on. Swim with me, Hiyori.”

Suddenly, he feels so much lighter.

Like a burden taken away from him.

For the first time in what feels ages, Hiyori’s smile is genuine.

“Okay, Ikuya.”

\----

Hiyori feels a moment of hesitation striking up when it’s his turn to dive in. Someone’s talking to him, and he looks up, surprised.

“Trust your friend.”

He stares into Nanase’s eyes.

“Trust Ikuya.”

Fuck. Did he really seem that desperate, to make _Nanase_ , out of all people, worry about him?

Hiyori looks into those blue eyes, then once again at the sight of Ikuya swimming gracefully into the water.

“I don’t need you to tell me that. I do trust him.”

\----

Ikuya hastily removes his swimming material.

When he looks at Hiyori’s diving form, Ikuya feels a familiar pinch in his heart.

Fuck.

_He’s beautiful._

\----

Hiyori breathes.

He throws a lopsided smile at Nanase, who’s next to him.

Maybe he’s not that bad, after all.

“I guess I lost.”

Nanase turns to look at him.

Hiyori thinks he sees the hint of a smile on his face.

“In free, maybe.”

\----

Ikuya catches Hiyori’s shiny eyes of when he mentions the little boy with a beautiful smile.

When Hiyori tells Ikuya he was probably that boy’s savior- _hero_ \- he wants to know more.

He wants to talk more- to question Hiyori more- to know exactly what’s on his mind.

But when he takes in Hiyori’s _(pretty)_ smile, he holds back.

Because maybe, it was okay like that.

\----

They’re both sitting on the sofa, a huge distance separating them.

It’s almost painful.

Ikuya had finished talking with Nanase and his friends, catching up with all this lost time.

They had gone back to Ikuya’s dorm room, agreeing that Hiyori would stay over.

Silence.

And then-

“I’m sorry.”

Hiyori looks up at that, and at his own surprise, Ikuya is already staring at him.

“I didn’t get to say it properly before. I’m sorry.”

And Hiyori wants to scream.

He wants to scream- because this isn’t supposed to be Ikuya’s fault.

 _He_ was the one supposed to apologize.

Ikuya seems to read his mind, because before he can even open his mouth, the other is going on.

“I really am.”

This is the first time Ikuya is looking at him like that- and it almost makes Hiyori want to avert his eyes.

“I’m sorry. For everything. For lashing out at you. For running away before giving you a proper apologize. For ignoring you the following days of our argument. For thinking I was alone. For being such an idiot.”

Hiyori gulps down, fighting back the tears.

_Come on. You got this. Don’t break down now._

“I’m sorry for not remembering you. That time when you saved me-”

Hiyori gasps. How-

Once again, Ikuya reads him like an open book and bites his lips before answering his question.

“My- my brother told me about it. After saying goodbye to Haru and the others, I called and asked him about that time. Something still didn’t feel right.”

Hiyori wants to wipe the frown off Ikuya’s face. He attempts to talk.

“Ikuya, I-”

“No- Please let me finish. I-”

Ikuya gulps down, and he looks so pained, his voice is strained, and Hiyori just wants to die.

“Why didn’t you tell me about it?”

Hiyori blinks.

Why?

Why, he wonders.

He hesitates before answering.

“I don’t really know. I mean- you didn’t remember our encounter when we were children back then and. Um. I don’t know- I just- I guess. I guess I wanted you to- figure it out by yourself?”

His voice cracks at the end of his speech, and wow, it’s official!

Hiyori wants to die.

Fuck.

Where did his confident self go to?

Before Ikuya can answer, Hiyori goes on.

“I wanted to apologize too. Obviously- I was also being real shitty. Both to you, but also Nanase and his friends- and the captain, too. Actually, kind of to everyone.”

Ikuya chuckles at that, and Hiyori thinks he might just die, right here, right now, both of embarrassment but also because _who allowed Ikuya to be this beautiful?_

“I guess we’re two, then.”

Hiyori smiles at that. Then he gulps down.

“Um, Ikuya. I-”

“Hiyori, will you go out with me?”

Hiyori chokes.

_Oh no. He really is dying._

“I’m sorry, what?”

Ikuya’s fully laughing at him now, and Hiyori thinks he just saw his soul ascend.

“Wow. I confess and that’s the response I get? Okay.”

Now he’s fully teasing Hiyori, and the latter kind of wants to smack him.

“That’s not what I mean! I mean- I- you- what?”

Ikuya looks so endeared (and Hiyori might be blushing). When he spaces out, Ikuya is there to wake him up.

“Hello? I’m still waiting for an answer, you know.”

Hiyori wants to answer, but emotions wash over him. The last days were honestly shitty, and he doesn’t know how they got from this to- _this._

His heart feels heavy, and he can feel it beating somewhere in the top middle of his body.

Tears are prickling at his eyes, and he’s finally- _finally_ letting them out.

“Of course I will.”

His voice is strained- he’s probably full on sobbing now, and he can vaguely see Ikuya behind the tears.

Suddenly the latter is opening his arms.

“Come here.”

Hiyori surely looks ugly now, tears all over his face and snot sliding down his nose.

He bawls his eyes out and launches himself at Ikuya, wrapping his arms around the other’s middle.

He feels a hand ruffling his hair and an arm wrapping itself around his waist.

At the end, he didn’t turn into sea foam.

\----

When Hiyori gets back to smile at him, Ikuya’s heart clenches.

This time, he’ll protect that smile.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> i was soO tired of their shit like ugh them making up was good bu t!! hiyori didn't get the justice he deserved!!!! u can tell me otherwise idc!! i said what i said!!
> 
> also them at the very end consists of hiyori kind of going back to his shy older self and him experiencing a little bit more of that more teasing side of ikuya!!  
> we love nostalgic children...
> 
> i hope you liked it! thank you in advance for every kudo or comment left, means a lot!
> 
> please watch out for any future work too hehe
> 
> love ya! -rin


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